Whoever thought that things would come to this?

In Vienna, Virginia, a school has banned any contact between students. No physical contact is allowed whatsoever. Tis even includes high-fives. Of course, it also includes hand holding, hugging and any other form of physical contact between two human beings.

Whereas schools have been cracking down on fighting and inappropriate contact, this school decided to take away any chance of something happening by banning everything. And why this crackdown on basic human action?

Well, according to the Principal of the school, they’re trying to create a comfortable and safe environment.

You’ve got to be kidding… Human contact is an important element of life. I’m not advocating fighting or inappropriate contact, but basic contact between friends is something that is built into our very essence.

But I guess that it’s better to just cut all ties to avoid awkward moments, right? I mean, what hapens if things get out of hand? What happens if your students start acting… Human?

I fear that this sort of thing is a sign of things to come. As political correctness invades every aspect of life, we will soon be forced into sterile existences; too afraid to act for fear of offending somebody and too afraid to stand up to it for fear of being called politically incorrect (or worse, of course)

I’m just glad that I went to school in the dark ages… I would’ve probably been jailed for my crimes. After all, I was a well known toucher (and canoodler). How inappropriate!